I think of You
as available if I need You —
if I call,
if I seek,
if I pursue.
As if grace could be up to me.
The truth is
You call out to me,
but I am too busy
earning Your love
to notice.
You aren’t passively waiting
for me to try harder —
to win Your favor.
You aren’t apathetic
to Your daughter.
I know You are good,
but I don’t always remember
That “good” means
gentle,
secure,
warm,
tender.
You reach out and
pull me to You —
in mercy.
In love.
I don’t have to beg for
Your attention.
I don’t have to ask
You to choose me.
I struggle
to understand
all that You are.
I wrestle against
Your compassionate hold.
I try to match your strength,
afraid You will let go.
You quiet me
in Your care.
You wrap me up
like a shivering child
relaxing underneath a soft blanket.
Here,
in Your arms,
I am settled
and soothed.
I breathe deeply.
I close my eyes.
I rest.